With so many moving parts immediately following impaired driving charges, it's easy for life to feel like it’s gotten out of control. This imbalance is caused by having to put immense focus on certain priorities to an extent that compromises other priorities.
The pressing issues involve coping with your drivers license suspension, dealing with impound, choosing a lawyer, deciding how to plead, and the stress of your internal emotions and thoughts, even present. It is no wonder that trying to find balance in an unstable situation affects every area of your life.
It doesn’t need to be like this though. You can regain your balance and get back at the helm with these strategies:
1. Finances. Many people tie their self-image to their income and cash flow. This isn't a healthy or well-balanced approach. Money and happiness don't correlate, but it is important to make sure you have enough to pay your bills and get through the months until the legal issues can be resolved.
If you don't have enough money to reliably pay your bills and feed your family, there's going to be stress. Focus on generating the income you need but avoid giving money more attention than it deserves.
2. Reputation. Most of us are often obsessed with the opinions of others, and thanks to social media, there are no secrets. However, during this time, you must put everything into perspective. Let go of the need to be admired by everyone. If your friends and family admire you, you're doing better than most.
Following this type of event, some people choose to withdraw from social interactions and reduce external stimuli to cope with stress. While self-isolation can provide relief, balance it with healthy coping strategies, such connecting with supportive friends and family.
Try to maintain perspective and shift focus by reminding yourself that your health, family, and safety are your fundamental priorities, and that your reputation isn’t solely defined by one event. Prioritize what truly matters, and over time, superficial concerns will fade.
3. Possessions. It's easy to feel negative when struggling with finances and having to say no to acquiring certain possessions or material items that you want to have. This is especially true if you are feeling empty inside, and you’ve used shopping as therapy in the past. But maybe this is the time to build better habits, maybe chasing possessions as a source of happiness has never been a good option for overcoming negative feelings.
By the same token, if you don't have the possessions you require, life is also unbalanced. Reliable transportation, suitable clothing, and a phone are a few possessions that are worth having.
Avoid letting possessions control your life but ensure that you have what you need.
4. Your appearance and health. Focusing on your health is a worthwhile use of your attention, but too many people are overly concerned with their appearance. When going through hardship, it can show on our face, you may put on a couple pounds, or you may feel like wearing pajamas all day long for a while. That’s ok!
Humans go through hardship, and they don’t always look their best, or feel their best. If someone is judging you, employ the “let them” theory as coined by Mel Robbins. You can still feel good about yourself, even if you are coping with puffy eyes, worry lines, or wearing your pajamas for two-days running.
Everyone has their own unique beauty, and what is on the inside matters most. Paying attention to your health and accepting your appearance will put this aspect of your life into balance.
5. Relationships. Relationships are important, but they're not the only thing in life. Putting all your emphasis on a relationship can limit other aspects of your life.
Relationships can be a significant source of both pleasure and stress. Following an impaired driving charge, when your life may feel out of control, you may be compelled to examine your relationships. This is normal following trauma, when prioritizing your health and the health of your family is paramount. During times like this, objectivity and compassionately determine if changes are warranted.
6. Career. We often define ourselves by our careers, but does it really matter? Whether you are a bestselling author, a domestic goddess or an astronaut, prioritize your work accordingly while you move through this challenging period in your life.
When coping with the trauma of impaired driving charges and all that goes along with it, maintaining cashflow is critical, so keep on showing up. Use your work time as a reprieve from the impaired event. But be mindful that now is not the time to take on extra work, or compete for a new promotion. Give work enough priority so that you're able to be productive and present but remember to balance it accordingly.
It's all about balance, so try to find your middle-path, and walk it as well as you can. Finding balance in your work, relationships, possessions, appearance and health will help you get back control.
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